My HUBBY ROCKS Fridays - "I Would NEVER Laugh at You"

I'm playing along with Definitelydebilyn/ who wants to spread some lovin' and recognize the great things our husbands do for us.

So hey, I figured "My husbands great! I'm promoting him!"

A few weeks ago, the boys were out in the yard planting trees. That sentence just made it sound easy. Let me rephrase. They were cutting down old diseased Aspen trees and digging large holes in rock hard soil. Then they had to actually plant the trees (6 of them) and fill the holes, water the trees and stake them. This was an all day back breaker. They had just played lacrosse games and came home to a hot afternoon of digging.

Brian was supervising the tree planting efforts. I felt a little bit guilty but I didn’t want to get dirty. I can’t work a shovel anyway. But I thought I should join in the camaraderie and went outside to be helpful.

Brian was draining the hot tub, so I volunteered to scrub it out. I waited until is was empty (save 4 inches of water in the bottom) and I took a big bucket of hot soapy water and scrub brush outside.

It was actually quite pleasant. I took off my shoes and socks, rolled up my jeans and climbed in and started scrubbing away. It was kind of slippery though. I kept sliding on the wet slippery curved seats but I was really contributing to the Saturday chores.

Brian came over to check on the progress. I joked with him: “Wouldn’t it be funny if you were standing there and I fell in this 4 inches of water? Wouldn’t you just laugh?

He looked at me seriously and said, “I would never laugh at you!”

He looked down at the hot tub controls to make some adjustments and woooossssssshhhhh………up went my feet, down went my butt and I landed on my back in the bottom of the hot tub.

Somehow, I managed in 4 inches of water to get completely- COMPLETELY- soaked.
Of course the initial slip caused me to shriek and everyone looked up from their jobs. Then I started laughing at the ridiculousness of what I had just said and what had just happened.

Brian didn’t laugh. “Are you okay?”
I laughed, “Yeah – can you believe that? I can’t believe I said that and 2 ½ seconds later it happened.”
“Yeah”
He didn’t even crack a smile.

Thanks Brian for never laughing at me! Heavens knows I’ve given you plenty of opportunities!

Parenting the Bonehead Brothers - The Early Years

Exactly how the Bonehead Brothers turned into themselves is a really good question.

Did they COME this way or did I MAKE them this way?
It’s the old question of Nature vs. Nurture.

Well here – you decide…………

I just read a blog about a lady who had a little problem with her preschool age son.

He came home talking about feces and where they come from. His mom told him that his language was not appropriate. He didn’t really care that much. He continued his potty talk and she presented him with a pickled pepper to eat. Much to her chagrin, he LIKED it. The potty talk continued and she gave him a squirt of Bath & Body Works Foaming Pineapple and something else soap. He promptly swallowed it and proclaimed it delicious!

So she was looking for advice.

We used Tabasco. Yep. When someone said a naughty word (I can actually only remember this happening with one Particular Child), I had him open wide and stick out his tongue. I poured a tiny little puddle of the hot sauce and voila! Problem solved!

He hasn’t said “Butthead” to this day!

Wait………now that I think about it, maybe the problem wasn’t solved

When this Particular Child was older, he had a bout of heartburn. He told me that during school, his heart would stop beating for just a second or two. And it was excruciating. Hmmm…….

I finally figured out that fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it), his heart wasn’t STOPPING. He was experiencing heart burn. He loves spicy foods – really spicy foods. Peppers, jalepenos, hot salsa, habanero sauce, really hot salsa, Chilula are all a part of every meal.

We eliminated all spicy foods but there didn’t seem to be much improvement.

Then, I walked into the kitchen one day and there he was….standing in front of the spice cupboard. He held a tortilla chip in one hand and the bottle of TABASCO in the other. He poured a ½ teaspoon or so on the center of the chip and then ate the WHOLE chip.

“Particular Child! What are you doing?”
“What? You said I can’t have chips and salsa.”“You can’t eat any spicy food.”
“I’m not! This isn’t spicy!”

So at the tender age of 3, we merely traded one problem for another.

Are Your Kids Making You as Miserable as They’re Making Me?

Dear Lady at the Grocery Store,

I didn’t have very much fun shopping with you and your three kids today.

By “with you” I know we didn’t plan it, but you guys were like a VISA card – everywhere I wanted to be.

I’m guessing your kids were between 6 and 8….so old enough.

In the produce section, your son was skating around with his heelys using a produce bag as a sail. He was dodging carts – or should I say THEY were dodging HIM?

Your two girls were arguing over who was going to carry the basket until they both worked together to fill it with produce you didn’t want……..but you didn’t notice the extra zucchinis and radishes until the bakery section. You told them to take everything back........but they didn't. You'll find the zuchinis by the bread.

Crazy how we were in all the same aisles! And your son can race up and down and up and down and up in down in no time on BOTH sides of the aisle…….like a roller rink. But he’s sooooo cute, so we all enjoyed it.

You didn’t happen to notice the cereal boxes the kids knocked off the shelf did you?

Now, I wasn’t WITH you on the snack and cookie aisle, but luckily I could HEAR you. I heard you say “No, we aren’t getting Oreos today.” You must have been teasing though because I saw them in your cart when you came around the corner.

Do your kids speak a different language than you? You spoke TO them frequently. And I liked what you had to say.

“Stay by me.”
“Here, hold your coat.”
“Stay right with me.”

"No, I already told you we can't get that."
“Don’t put anything in the cart.”
“You need to stay right by the cart.”

"Where have you been?"

But your kids obviously didn’t understand you.
Maybe they don’t speak English. I shouldn’t judge.

Luckily, your son did recognize American with an Asian accent when the bagger gasped and called out “Don’t put that bag on your head!” as he skated by with the produce bag on his head.

Maybe you could hire a child whisperer or a circus trainer, either one.

Your kids are quite acrobatic. I couldn’t believe all three of them could fit on that little horse ride. But I guess if you have one sitting on the head, one kneeling on the saddle and one standing on the tail, it all works out.

Good thing they didn’t fall because THEN the store would owe you lots of money. They really need to hire someone to man that ride while your back is to them. Isn’t that one of the times you said, “Stay right here?” But that was when you were paying and holding your daughter’s coat…..so it’s totally understandable.

And it’s a good thing everyone in the parking lot is so conscientious. On your way out, you stopped in the middle of the doorway, told everyone to hold on to the cart and then proceeded out into the street.

Hey one out of three ain’t bad. Heely boy raced ahead. I mean, how could you not when you have wheeled shoes. And one lagged behind, but you noticed she was missing when you got to the car. All’s well that ends well!

But call me when you are going to the store again…….no not so I can go with you! So that I can stay home.

The Bonehead Brothers Plan the High Adventure

For some strange reason, the Bonehead Brothers don’t love Scouting.

Brian was asking for suggestions for this summer’s Venture Scout High Adventure.

It can be anything……….well anything cheap and not TOO dangerous.

Fishing? Camping? Hiking a Fourteener? (For those not from Colorado, we have a large number of mountains that tower over 14,000 feet. Some have paved hiking trails to the top. Some are rugged and require hard core mountain climbing) Four Wheeling? White River Rafting?

Here is Garrett’s idea for a FUN High Adventure –
Go to a cabin and use it as the “base camp.”

Day 1, have a group of girls come up to the cabin. Do something adventurous – like hiking with the girls. Fix them dinner. Send them home.
Day 2: Have ANOTHER group of girls come up. Go four wheeling with them. Fix them dinner. Send them back down the mountain.

Day 3: Have a DIFFERENT group of girls come to the cabin. Go fishing or panning for gold or rafting. Fix them dinner. Send them home.

You get the idea. Garrett’s perfect High Adventure does not really include other scouts.

Oh wait! He said that if the girls on Day 1 are cool, there is really no need to send them home. Well, won't that make things soooo much easier!

What is the REAL Problem Here?

This is my Candy Cupboard.

I know!
Can you believe what a disorganized mess it is?
I’m going to clean it out sometime today……..or tomorrow…..sometime. Cuz really, it should be alphabetized or something - like the spice cupboard.

It IS kind of organized -

The top shelf is for big bags of bulk candy – like the bags of 500 mini candy bars you get at Costco.....like candy food storage.

The middle shelf is for unopened smaller boxes and bags – like theater candy or bags of candy from the grocery story or seasonal candy like jelly beans. I don’t really know how or why that Halloween cauldron is there.

The bottom shelf is for individual candy bars or small bags of opened candy.

See it’s not that hard! It’s really quite simple.

But the question I find myself asking today is not WHY is this cupboard such a mess but WHY do I even have a Candy Cupboard?..........not a little hiding place behind the crackers, not a drawer, not a singular shelf way up high, but a WHOLE CANDY CUPBOARD!?!

Ask me about my Snack Drawer! (I just restocked it!)

Tiny Baby is TICKED OFF!

First of all – WHO makes an ortho appointment for 7:10 AM during SPRiNG BReaK? Helloooo? We can go at that time IF it means missing class, but NOT if it means missing sleep.

But Parker consoled himself that it would be a short visit to check the progress on his tooth that is ssssllllloooowwwlllyyyy coming in. He assures me that he will be back in his cozy bed by 8.

The ortho is so HAPPY that his tooth is almost all the way in. The ortho is DISAPPOINTED because he is going out of town this afternoon and when he gets back, SPRiNG BReaK will be over and had he known, they could have scheduled an appointment to put Parker’s braces on.

It’s our LUCKY day! The 9:15 appointment accidentally showed up at 7. We can have the 9:15 opening!

Parker is ticked! He wasn’t expecting this good fortune. They excuse us at 7:30 with instructions to be back at 9.

Parker's getting braces! Parker's getting braces!

Parker wants his last meal………and it better be good.

We drive to the mall that is close by.
P – Can we go to Chili’s?
Me – They’re not open.
P – P.F. Changs?
Me – Not open
P – Jim and Nicks? Rumbi?
Me – Nothing is open at 7:30 except for Village Inn

We go there and he orders – the TOP SIRLOIN with a salad and onion rings!

He’s bummed but he vows that he will be a miracle patient. He’s pretty sure that when we go back in 8 weeks, they will congratulate him and tell him that his braces can come off in 3 more weeks.

I heard all kinds of crazy things (and there are no drugs involved)
P – Oh, I won’t be able to go to lacrosse practice. I’ll be on bedrest.
P – When you pick up my Juice Stop this afternoon, get good flavors. Don’t get anything with peach or coconut.
P – This is horrible!
P – I won’t be able to go to lacrosse practice because I don’t have a mouthguard.
P – Who needs straight teeth? Why can’t I just get a teeth transplant?He doesn't want us to see the "after" look.Big brothers with IPhones are so helpful at getting these shots!

UNTITLED

I’m leaving this post untitled because I want you to be able to draw your own conclusions.

Last night, I woke up in the wee hours. Because I lack any kind of self control whatsoever, I got out of my bed and checked the computer for Trammell’s weekly email. It comes in the middle of the night Tuesday. Rather than wait until some coherant hour on Wednesday, I would rather lean into the screen with bleary eyes and search for the one line I am looking for.

“Good Morning Family! I hope that you are all doing well. I can’t wait to read this weeks emails later today. And last weeks. And the week before that. But I skim over them every once in a while and am glad to hear that everything’s going well. Things are going great here!”

He’s happy. That’s all that matters to me. I allow myself to breathe and continue with his letter. It was fabulous, as usual.

Not wanting to wake Brian, I slid back into bed silently. But I couldn’t fall asleep. Parts of the letter kept coming back to me….. parts that held answers to some of my rhetorical questions from yesterday.

Answers come in different ways. And people get different answers to the same question. I will refrain from commenting. Once again, I want to allow people to draw their own conclusions and find their own answers.

Here are some snippets from Trammell’s letter.

“Transfer calls came this morning... and- I am not going anywhere- thank goodness! But Elder Godfrey is coming down to the city! He is the new AP! I am excited to be able to see him a lot more and to learn from him again.”

Elder Godfrey was Trammell’s trainer. His first companion. He was everything we prayed for………and more. We haven’t met him but we love him. We love him for showing Trammell “how it is done.” We love him for setting Trammell up for the remainder of his mission.

“Her husband's name is Laay. He is good. He has great faith. He has some amazing experiences with prayer. Last week Laay went to buy a space to sell goods. He needed a hundred dollars, he said, “Eh, it’s just a hundred dollars, I don’t really need to pray about it.” Those were his exact words. Well, the first four places he went couldn’t loan/give him money. Finally he prayed, then called his brother who came immediately, gave him the money, and they went and bought the place. Man that was so cool! It showed that no matter what- whether small or big- we should ALWAYS pray unto the Lord! I know that when we do that, then He will consecrate our efforts for our good! I have seen this so much! That a little pray here or a little prayer there has so much influence on the things that we do, and that he will truly consecrate it for our good. I learned this last night. We have to be in the house by 8:30 at the latest. You know me- I like to be obedient, and so we left and literally as we left from our appointment, a powerful wind came- man it was so hard to ride back in this wind and we only had 15 minutes! So I said a quick prayer. I prayed that we would be able to make it back on time and that the Lord would give us strength to make it back. Then we just pedalled as hard as we could! Miraculously we made it back at 8:29! I know that when we turn it over to the Lord first, and then work as hard as we can, He will take what we do and then make it complete and whole."

Lastly, I would like to share Trammell’s companion’s email that he sent Brian. Trammell’s companion and his family joined the Church in Cambodia a year ago. He is now serving a mission and his father is the 1st counselor in the Branch Presidency up in Siem Reap (6 hours from the mission home- Trammell’s first place – home of Elder Godfrey for the last 9 months.)

Here it is- unedited.

"dear brain thanks for your worry for me and your son i have tow sisters i am so exitet to hear general conference now i am so happy in 2 branch some time i miss my family but elder cox help me to be joy and work hard i forgot homsick elder cox know cambodain alots i can not help him because he know more khmer than me i just help him to pronounciation more clearly i love him he try to study and obedint exactly i love this work love from elder da"

Well there you have it.........24 hours of my thoughts. Scary, I know! Thanks for letting me take this very public 24 hour journey and for sharing it with me.