Thursday, March 3, 2011

Help Wanted: Reliable Worker With a GOOD Attitude!

Every SINGLE day, Brian begs me to come to his office.
Sometimes he bribes me with donuts.
I always ask, "But what would I DO there?"
Sometimes he says he just wants me to hang out with him.
Sometimes he says he has so many projects he can't begin to list them.

Sometimes, I AM helpful - remember when I copied all those documents but then stapled my finger and got blood all over said documents and had to recopy them?
If THAT'S not helpful, I don't know what is.

I showed up at his office the other day.
Brian: " you want to go shopping?"
Normally, I would jump at the chance.
But this totally sounded like a trap.

Me: "No."

Brian: "You could go to Costco for us."

Me: hesitating, "What do you need?"
Brian: "Well we need some of those floor mats that you put under your office chair so it will roll smoothly."
Me: "Nope.  I can't get those.  They are too heavy.  Plus they have poky things that stab you.  What else do you need?"

Brian: "We can always use paper and water."
Me: "Nope.  Those are too heavy.  I can't lift them and I'll break my nails.  Do you need anything small and M&M's?"

See!  I am SOOOO helpful!
Who WOULDN'T want to hire me?


Raven said...

lol, you crack me up. I'd probably be about as helpful.

Stef said...

Haha. That is hilarious. There is just some shopping that only a man should do. For me, it's all shopping. I don''t enjoy any of it...not one bit. Okay, shopping for babies is fun That's it.

(ps There are stations at my work that for whatever reason won't let me go into your blog. **must be all that foul language and references that you make** But I'm catching up today at home. Didn't want you to think I was withholding fromya!)

For FRANKS Sake said...

lol That sounds like my hubby. He is also famous for while you are out can you pick drives me crazy!