Monday, January 31, 2011

2011 Swimsuit Edition

What strikes fear in every woman's heart and is one of the most dreaded tasks ever....worse than last week's mammogram?


SWIMSUIT SHOPPING!


And if cramming yourself in a small booth and stuffing your body into sausage casing under blinking flourescent lights isn't entertaining enough in May.........try doing it in January.


Because -
It's fun to wrangle 7 layers of clothing on and off.
Swimsuits always look better with black knee high socks.....or snow boots
And the only thing less attractive than jiggly thigh flesh.........is white jiggly thigh flesh!


A few weeks ago (right after eating my way through November and December), Brian suggested *we* go swimsuit shopping.
Brave soul!
He actually got me kind of excited about it.........
until he asked, "Are you going to have a good attitude?"
I answered honestly, "NO!"


We met at the department store.
I arrive 20-30 minutes before him.
I previewed the suits and then I even tried on the suits so I could show him the ones that didn't make me guffaw out loud or curl up in the fetal position crying.


And guess what?
I found some!
I found four suits.




 Yes, this one has matching bottoms.




Can you believe it?


I guess I did have a good attitude because I concentrated on looking at what was below the neck and above my thighs.  I ignored the veins that look like the road map of LA on my legs.  I ignored the pasty, sun deprived skin.  I ignored that parts of me are bony and my biggest asset which is....well...my asset.


In one store, the salesgirl told Brian he could join me in the dressing room.
No!  I'm not going to comment.  Just NO!

But my long underwear, ski socks, jeans, turtleneck, sweater and mittens back on and paid.........before I changed my mind.
GINA

Saturday, January 29, 2011

52 Weeks of Crock-Potting Craziness

I LOVE my crockpot.  I love it so much, I've worn several out.


The best thing about using the crockpot is that you do all the work in the morning, when you are awake and feel like working.
An then at the end of the day, when you are tired and worn out, you are rewarded with a delicious meal!


This year, we have church from 1 to 4 pm.
Everyone (okay, the three of us) come stumbling in the door at 4:30ish completely famished.
We want food NOW.......not an hour from now.
And we certainly don't want to have to work for it!


So every Sunday, I fire up the crock pot for some hearty goodness!
Just the smell, when we come in, is enough to satisfy us until we can get the salad, rice or whatever the side dishes are, made.


Last Sunday,
we had Crockpot Italian Beef Sandwiches!  Mmm.......mmmmm!


CROCKPOT ITALIAN BEEF SANDWICHES
3-4 lb Beef Chuck Roast
8 oz of Roasted Red Pepper with juice
8 oz of Sliced Pepperoncini Peppers with juice
1 Onion - thinly sliced
2 Tablespoons Italian Seasonings
2 Cans Beef Broth
Salt  & Pepper
Olive Oil


1 Baguette or other Crusty Bread
Sliced Provolone Cheese


Sprinkle a generous amount of salt and pepper on the beef.  Heat up a skillet over medium heat.  Add a couple tablespoons of oil.  Brown the beef in the pan on both sides.  Set beef in crockpot,  Add the sliced onions to the skillet and saute for about 5 minutes until golden and softened.  While they are cooking, layer the red peppers and pepperoncini on the beef.  Add the onions.  Sprinkle the Italian seasonings on top.  Pour the beef broth over everything.


Cook on warm for 8 hours.

Sorry!  We were too hungry to take the "after" picture of the meat - as in AFTER it was cooked but BEFORE we ate it.
Too delicious!

Friday, January 28, 2011

Scooby Doo's IQ vs Sponge Bob's

Seriously?  It's Friday?  I can't believe I'm still alive.  Some weeks are like that.
Thank heavens for Mrs. 4444!
Fragment are ALL I've got left!
Go on over to Half Past Kissin' Time and say "Hi!" -AFTER you read ANDcomment.


* I just got this email -
"33% OFF any one item..........PLUS, you save an additional 10%.  That's nearly 40% off."

What?  Isn't it EXACTLY 43% off?
Maybe this boookstore doesn't sell Math books.

*Parker: Did they have any good cartoons when you were younger?"
Me: "Yeah.  I wish they were still on.  I loved Tom & Jerry and Scooby Doo."


Parker: "Tom & Jerry is still on.  Scooby Doo is too.......but it's not good."
Me: "Yeah it is."
Parker: "No it's not.  Scooby Doo isn't intelligent."
Me: "What?  Like Sponge Bob is?  Give me a break."


Parker: "Oh yeah -Sponge Bob is.  Like a 4 year old is going to get Squidward's jokes.  I think Squidward might be my new favorite character."

Glad we justified all that Sponge Bob watching.

* Call us if you are ever in a bind!
We have awesome solutions for life's tricky problems!

 In the middle of dinner, I received this text:
"Hey do you know what would take a whole bunch of ink off hands?"
Hmmm...........
I responded: "Sorry!  Did an ink pen explode?  I don't know....bleach? alcohol?......the rubbing kind."
"No.......the printer cartridge got confused and I have printer ink all over."

Suddenly, the geniuses in the family came to life with suggestions.
Parker: "Tell him to try hydrochloric acid."
Brian: "No, tell him gasoline.....................and a match.  After that, he won't notice the ink."

Thanks guys!

* All of us met at a restaurant for dinner last night.
Me: What happened to your car?"
Brian: "Oh I was in the drive thru at Sonic and this guy leaned out of his car and said, 'Do you mind if I walk around your car?'  I told him 'Sure, go ahead.' He then said, 'I can fix your car.  I can take all of those scratches out.  I can make your car look like new."
Parker: "Cool!  It's like repentance..........sold at Sonic."

* Because the conversations in my own booth were so intelligent,
I started eavesdropping on the people in the booth behind me.
Diner to Friend: "Oh yes, I'm recommending a really good book: "How to be Christian Without Being Religious."

It's probably on the shelf next to Sexual Aspects of the Celibate Life.

If you are bored this weekend, there are two hot reads for you!

Happy Friday!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Mission Questions: Answered!

As Garrett has been preparing to receive his mission call to serve for The Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day Saints, we've been talking a lot about Mormon missions and missionaries.
And a lot of people have asked some wonderful questions.


My friend Andrea from Blogging Mama emailed me with the following -
"On the post Money, Money, Money! -
Are the kids required to go on a mission?
And what happens if they are in college?
Do they just pick back up after two years away? That seems hard."


Great questions Andrea!


1. "Are kids required to go on a mission?"


It's not a requirement.  It's an expectation.
From the time my boys were teeny, we always talked about "WHEN you go on your mission" not IF.
Church service is an integral part of our religion.  We have a lay ministry.  No one is paid.  It's a church of volunteers.  Service is expected.  Likewise, for young men, serving a mission is an expectation.


In a recent church conference, the prophet, Thomas S. Monson said -
"First, to young men of the Aaronic Priesthood and to you young men who are becoming elders: I repeat what prophets have long taught—that every worthy, able young man should prepare to serve a mission. Missionary service is a priesthood duty—an obligation the Lord expects of us who have been given so very much. Young men, I admonish you to prepare for service as a missionary. Keep yourselves clean and pure and worthy to represent the Lord. Maintain your health and strength. Study the scriptures. Where such is available, participate in seminary or institute. Familiarize yourself with the missionary handbook Preach My Gospel."


Okay - I added the bold.


Most LDS families talk about missions from birth and mothers and fathers and Sunday School teachers and youth leaders all have a common goal of helping young men receive a testimony of the Gospel and a desire to share it with others.  We begin preparations at a young age- saving money, instilling values, learning skills for independence etc.


2. "What happens if they are in college?"


Because the majority of young men leave on missions when they are 19, most of them are in college.  Trammell left for his mission immediately following his freshman year of college.  Garrett will do the same.  Some only finish a semester.  Some graduate from high school early to get more college in before they leave.


Most colleges allow the student to defer his enrollment.  They just have to fill out some forms and the school allows them to re-enroll in two years. In fact, the military academies now allow Mormon missionaries to defer their education and come back.  They do have a requirement that you need to put in two years of school before you defer, but they allow it.

3. "Do they just pick back up after two years away? That seems hard."




Yes and yes.
About six months before Trammell returned from his mission, he received a letter from the university asking to verify that he was indeed returning to school in the Fall of 2011.  They also provided registration information for the new academic year.

Somehow, moms of his freshman friends tracked me down and we all decided on a condo for the boys to live in upon their return to school.

The boys were all on missions and didn't have time to "condo shop." And after living in third world conditions for two years, they didn't care if they lived in tents.


When they get back from their mission, there is a big adjustment period.
They go from focusing on one thing - sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ
to real life - school, friends, work, bills, TV, and GIRLS!
It is hard to get back into the swing of things and strike a balance between all of the things calling out to you.
It's also hard to leave being a spiritual high and not having to worry about "earthly" things and now being hit by a barrage of decisions. There is a lot to think about....like what to do with the rest of your life

 
Return missionaries will tell you it's hard to adjust.
But they would not trade their two years of experiences for anything!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

A Wee Bit of Me Wednesday!

{one} how tall are you?
5' 6"
 
{two} besides bills, what do you spend most of your money on?
Keeping two kids in college - apartments, tuition, books, food.
 
{three} what are your three favorite websites?
Hmmm... I don't have any FAVORITES.
Just email, FB and blogs.
 
{four} what brand of tennis shoes do you prefer?
Hee hee ha ha....good one!  Tennis shoes imply action - like working out and sweating. I don't wear tennis shoes.  I bought a pair of pink Asics THREE YEARS AGO. They look brand new.
 
{five} what food can you absolutely not stand to eat?
I'm not really interested in raw fish.
 
{six} How many pairs of jeans do you own?
Lots....lots....  But I have 3-4 that are my current faves.  Then I have old standbys.
 
{seven} if you could have any job, what would it be?
Coroner.....definitely a coroner or maybe investigating murders.
 
{eight} have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
No.....thank heavens!
Should I knock in wood?
 
{nine} how many pillows do you sleep with?
Two.  There are 12 on our bed but 5 get tossed off when we go to bed.
 
{ten} on a scale of 1-5, how organized are you?
4 - I like to be organized.  I like to be able to find things.  Do I have a junk drawer?  Yes, several.  Do I have some cupboards or closets that need to be cleaned out?  Deifnitely.  But I like everything to have a place and I like to throw out stuff!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Let Me Make It Easy For You: Nerf Guns & Peter Rabbit


Oh yeah!  We survived Monday (barely).  And it's time to celebrate.  Let's celebrate with a cupcake and some RaNDoM!  Thanks to Keely for sponsoring the three ring circus of minds over at The Un Mom.
Git on over there and join in the fun.

* Yesterday was fun.  I went and had my annual mammogram.  Woohoo!
I use the term "annual" loosely.
We usually go get them in November.
We = my friend, Margaret and I.
We go together, get it done and go to lunch.


Margaret decided we shouldn't go in November because "Who wants to recieve bad news right before the holidays?"
A little fatalistic?
My response, "Yeah, but bad news is bad news.  Is there ever really a good time to get bad news?"
Margaret: "Yeah, January! Because by next Christmas you'll either be cured or dead."

I feel much better!


* How sad is it that Jack Lalanne died?
You don't know who he is?
The "Godfather of Fitness"
He was a fixture in American households in the 70's!  When you go to the gym and get on all those tortuous machines?  He invented half of those!
Sadly, he died the other day.
Okay, he was 96 and lived a full, healthy, wonderful life.  It can't be that sad.
But I really do remember my mom exercising to his TV show in the mornings when I was little....really little.

* In the "Why do I waste my breath" category -

Me: Don't forget to clean your room.
Parker: "I know.  It's on my list of priorities."
Me: "Your list of priorities? You have a list?"
Parker: "Yeah.....it's my LAST priority, but it's on there."

* I took the pads off my dining room table.
The "Party Season" is officially OVER!


The pads and assorted tableclothes, glitter corn, candles, ornaments, pom poms etc. have graced the table since early November.
It's time to close that room down and take a nap.

* I just received this email this morning:
"REMINDER: Your stay at the - - - - - hotel in Cancun starts Tuesday, February 8th."

Like I would have FORGOTTEN!
Good one!

* Looking at key words that bring people to my blog,
the top two searches are
NERF GUNS
and
PETER RABBIT.


What is wrong with people?
I hope people aren't entering both search terms at once!

Have a great, super-duper TueSDaY!
Gina

Monday, January 24, 2011

BEST. SATURDAY. EVER!

Saturday was awesome!
No, we weren't on a cruise nor did we go on a spending spree.
We just hung out.....just the two of us.


Yeah......TWO of us.
Sorry, Trammell, Garrett and Parker!
Before there was us - the five Coxes, the crazy Coxes,
there was US - just two of us.
We are this close ( ) to being empty nesters.
2012 is our year!
But on Saturday, with Trammell in college in Utah, Garrett in college in Idaho, and Parker in the mountains for a leadership retreat, the house was EMPTY.


We got to do whatever we wanted.
It's not that glamorous, but it was just US, so it was awesome.
Brian left at 7:30 and went to help a lady from church move.
Then he went to his office.
I got up and puttered around the house.
I packed up my breakfast - 2 cupcakes, a little bag of chips and a coke and went to his office.
He worked, we talked, I booked a trip to go with Garrett to the temple, we chatted, we made plans, we got hungry.

We came and went as we wanted.  We reported in to no one.
We ran a couple of errands,
picked up 3 movies at Redbox,
ate Linner (Lunch & Dinner combined) at 3 pm at a Chinese restaurant.


We ran to the grocery store,
went to the movie theater and bought movie theater popcorn,
climbed up on our bed at 5 pm and started the first movie.


Half way through the second, we were hungry again.
We ventured out to the kitchen and made snacks and got back on the bed.
Finished the second movie, watched the news and called it a day.


Nope it wasn't anything expensive or adventurous or filled with gourmet food and there was little socializing with the outside world but it was perfect!

Love you boys!
But I'm counting the days to May 26, 2012!

Saturday, January 22, 2011

I Pledge Allegiance

This was true in 1969 and it's still true today!
I LOVE this country and what is stands for.


Friday, January 21, 2011

Squirrels, Ridiculous Gifts, & Cupcakes Galore

If you lived in my head, you would understand that EVERY day is Fragment Day!
Thank heavens Mrs. 4444  gives us a chance to let it out or my head would explode!
Go on over to Half Past Kissin' Time and give her some love!


* I received this text from one of my college boys:
"I just ate a giant Red Velvet Cupcake."
I responded like the mature, parental unit that I am:
"Brat!"


* In revenge, I busted this out
(Stupidest appliance ever made but I love it because it was given to me by my brother)
and made my own cupcakes.
Na, na, na, na, na!!!!


* Is this my desk or a craft table?
Sometimes it's hard to tell!

*Yes, someone took a bite out of most of those chocolates and put them back.
I'm kind of picky about my chocolates.


*With his brothers away at college, Parker has his choice of 3 rooms upstairs - HIS room with a queen bed, a room with a twin bed, or the guest room with a queen bed.  OR, he could sleep in the bedroom in the basement with a queen bed.  But NO!  This is where he has chosen to sleep this week:
The family room couch!  Isn't that Burger King pillow case hideous?  It's ANOTHER lovely gift from one of my brothers.  What did I do to deserve such gifts?

* Overheard -
"Yeah, since graduation, I can't believe some of the choices my friends have made. I don't know what happened. But some people have made some pretty crazy choices."

"Seriously.....like Henry.*  He went off the deep end."

"He didn't go off the deep end.  He's in a whole different pool!"

* Good News!
My beautiful neighbor Elizabeth and her charming husband Armie won the Glamour Online Poll for most gorgeous celebrity couple of the red carpet at the Golden Globes.  Armie will be on Leno tonight.  And I previewed Elizabeth's dress for the SAG awards.  It's beautiful, but she could wear a potato sack and look gorgeous.


*Today is Squirrel Appreciation Day!
Who doesn't love squirrels?
I don't know how you are supposed to show your appreciation.
Maybe we should all run outside and hug one.

Have a great weekend!
Gina

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Money, Money, Money!

I have been asked WHO pays for missionaries to go on missions?
How do they find and pay for housing, transportation and food on their missions?


Very good questions!!!!

Short answer - The missionary!

Long answer -

Many moons ago, when my husband and brother were serving missions, each mission cost a different amount.  This was 25+ years ago. A mission in South America could be under $100 a month and mission somewhere like Japan would be upwards of $800. Because the missionary or their family bears the cost, it could be quite a burden to have your son or daughter sent to one of those more "expensive" missions.

Since then, the church has equalized the cost of missions.  Everyone pays the same amount every month, regardless of where they go.  This makes a lot more sense.

Pre-mission:  Each missionary receives a list of clothing and supplies that they will need to bring with them.  You can imagine what is on the list: 10-12 white shirts (short or long sleeve, depending on the climate) 2 suits, 12 pairs of socks, 2-3 pairs of shoes.  It's a masterful list.  Everything has to fit in two suitcases, so there isn't room for "nice to have" items.  Depending on the mission, the missionary might need a winter coat and boots, an umbrella, or 12 handkerchiefs (to wipe the sweat off your face in Cambodia).  Sometimes they ask you to purchase and bring a bike with you.  Or they might ask you to bring money to purchase a bike once you arrive in your mission.  In the United States, these bikes might be several hundred dollars.  In Cambodia, Trammell purchased a bike for $35 (the norm) at his first location.  When he left one area to go to another, he left the bike for the next person.  Likewise, when he arrived at his new location, the previous missionary had left him a bike.  They were all junky.  He purchased 2 or 3 bikes while in Cambodia.  They get stolen frequently.

The missionary is also responsible for getting a passport if necessary and any required shots.  Trammell had a list of 6 or 7 shots that he needed to get.  The Church will take care of any necessary Visas for the missionaries.

The Church also pays to transport the missionary to and from his mission. 

Mission: The monthly cost is the missionary's responsibility.  The cost of the two year mission (minus all the clothes, supplies, bikes, passports etc) is roughly $10,000.  At our house, we have asked the boys to pay 1/2.  Garrett has had his $5,000 for quite some time and Parker already has his saved and sitting in an account.  We started talking about missions a long time ago, so none of this is a surprise to the boys.  They have been saving since they were little.

Each month, the money to pay for the mission goes directly to the Church. The Church then forwards on the necessary funds to the Mission President.  Once in the mission field, the Church has already taken care of leasing apartments and purchasing cars (if travel by car is the norm - very rare - even in the US).  It's not like your 19 year old arrives in a town and has to go sign a lease on an apartment.  There are already apartments leased and places to live.  The mission president gives each missionary what he has deemed necessary to live on each month. They don't pay electric, phone or gas bills.  They really only use the money for food, bus fare, personal items and postage.  So they don't need a whole lot.  I can't remember what Trammell's amount was.  I think it was $135, but in Cambodia, that can go really far.  He said that he was never starving and never ran out of money, unless he had to buy a new bike. ;)

Yes, the parents can send extra money or the boys can have a personal credit card but the Church really discourages this because afterall, they aren't there for a shopping or siteseeing extravaganza.  Usually, if the missionary needs something like new shoes or a new suit, his parents will purchase it and send it or they will send the necessary money for the extra expenditure.  But once again, they aren't your typical 19 and 20 year olds, so they don't need a wardrobe of Nike's and Polos.

It takes a lot of planning and saving and dedication to go on a mission.  It's definitely not something that you just decide when you turn 19.  The preparation is lifelong.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Wee Bit of Me Wednesday!

It's Wednesday and it's time to join Leigh Ashley -



Go on over and say hi!

{one} name one thing you worry about running out of.

Butter!  I hoard butter in my freezer.  I get worried when I dip below 8 pounds.  Wow!  I have issues!
{two} what is your favorite pizza topping?

I'm going to have to go with plain ole pepperoni - although I do love to saute up a batch of onions and mushrooms (in butter) and add them too!
{three} what is your favorite harrison ford movie?
I remember LOVING Raiders of the Lost Ark.  But The Fugitive was probably the best.
{four} apple juice or orange juice?
Orange but only ice cold.  My first choice of juice would be Coke.
{five} what’s your favorite thing to do on a sunday afternoon?
Nap.


{six} what is the wallpaper on your cellphone of?
Since I don't really utilize the features on my phone except to talk and text, I don't have a catalog of personal photos.  So I stick with whatever it came with - blue butterflies.
{seven} do you have a favorite tv commercial?
I don't really watch TV. I can't recall a favorite.
 
{eight} what is the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
I'm not really experimental when it comes to food. A couple of weeks ago, I did eat a whole fried flounder - bones and scales and all. My kids have me beat -


                                     


{nine} what is one piece of clothing you can’t live without?
Furry slippers.  I wear them all day in the house with everything - jeans, skirts, dress pants.  Everything.  And yes, I have packed them in my suitcase for trips.
{ten} if you were a character from “lost”, who would you be?
Once again, I don't watch much TV.  I have NEVER seen a single episode of Lost.  I'm a Lost loser! ;)
 
That's it for today's installment of "Wee Bit of Me!"
Oh....and the Food Network show that I was supposed to be in the audience of last night got rescheduled.  It's tomorrow night and I'm not going.  Maybe next time!
 
Gina

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

2 Oreos or 1 Wasa Cracker and an Egg? That's a Choice?

It's the LAST day of Parker's 4 day weekend.
We really know how to celebrate Martin Luther King around here.
We get one more day off of school.
Unfortunately, we slept through the Marade yesterday.
No.  That is NOT a typo.
What is a Marade?
It sounds kind of violent to me - like Maraud.
But whatever.  A Marade is a cross between a Parade and a March.
I guess the people can't decide if they are ticked or happy.

But I'm happy!
It's Tuesday!  It's RaNDoM!

What's not to be happy about?  Get on over to Keely's and tell her how happy you are!

* Trammell called Saturday night.
As I answered the phone, I heard him saying, "Yeah - they aren't even on straight.  Look at that girl."
"Hello"
Trammell: "Please tell me you are watching Miss America!"
"Nope.  I'm not.
Trammell: "Well, you should be."
"I'm not.  I'm eating and besides, Dad's watching football."
Trammell: "Okay.  Whatever.  Bye."


Five minutes later the phone rings.
"Hello?"
Trammell: "So you turned it on right?"
"Nope.  Not watching."


*One of my favorite activities is reading recipe magazines while eating.
I love Bon appetit and Everyday Food.
I HATE the January issues.
They are all about "light" food.
What's the point of eating then?


For example, they gave some healthy snacking tips this month:
10 potato chips = 1 corn tortilla and 1/5 of an avocado
I'll take the potato chips AND a whole avocado.


1/2 of a snickers bar = 24 pretzel sticks and 2 tablespoons of dried cranberries.
Double or nothing!  Duh!
Stupid health tips!


*Every night, Brian goes into the hot tub.
I have only gone in the hot tub 3 times in the 8 or so years we have owned it.
It's just not my thing.
Every night, he invites me.
Last night he teased, "Why not?  Why won't you ever go? It will strengthen our relationship and bring unity to our marriage.

I ignored him.

"Well, when we end up in divorce court, the judge will say that it all could have been avoided if only you had gone in the hot tub."


"No problem.  When we get divorced, you can have the hot tub."


"Fine.  And you can have the washer and dryer."
True love people!!!  True Love!

* I almost forgot!
I'm going to the taping of a Food Network show tonight.
No I don't know which one.
I know nothing.
But I'll tell you about it after I read the legal papers and find out what show it is and when I can tell you about it!

Monday, January 17, 2011

GOLDEN GLOBES

Did you watch the Golden Globes?
I watched the "important" awards..........meaning the ones that Social Network was nominated for!
Yes, my beautiful neighbor Elizabeth and her extremely charming husband Armie were a hit o the red carpet and I watched to support them -
Social Network took home 4 Golden Globes including Best Picture, Drama.

Besides watching to see if Social Network won, the only OTHER reasons to watch are the DRESSES.
They range from classy to beautiful to ridiculous to "What were they thinking?"
On nights like this, for shows like this, I nominate myself Fashion Critic.

So if you missed it -
 Eva Longoria - classy black.  Trending toward tasteful but she is spilling out a tad much. 

 Halle Berry -  I like the black foundation garments.  Where's the dress?
 Christina Aguilera - Oh dear!  Siren Mermaid?  Those are A LOT O CURVES!
Helena Bonham - It doesn't add up.  Or does it?  Hair+Dress+Shoes =Travesty. 
 Nicole Kidman - Always classy.
 Carrie Underwood - Gorgeous
 Leighton Meester - Too much fabric.  Are those 80's shoulder pads?
 Michelle Williams - Best disguise.  Her dress matches her skin and her hair.  Winner if you are going incognito!

Sandra?  Is that Sandra Bullock under there?  Or is that the Shaggy DA?

Natalie Portman - Nice bed sheet!  I understand she is pregnant but there are gorgeous dresses for pregnant women.  You don't just have to swath yourself in a bolt of material and stable a rose in between your breasts.  Plus, I made the mistake of listening to her acceptance speech which somehow took a turn for the worse as she praised Ben for getting her in this condition.  Oh dear!
Elizabeth - Best red dress on the red carpet!  Totally classy and always gorgeous!

January Jones - WORST red "jumper" on the red carpet!
 Mila Kunis - Gorgeous in emerald green!
Shaun Robinson - Beautifully fitted!  She knows how to pull of sparkly!  She's lovely

Olivia Wilde - Eek!  A little too much sparkly!  The fairy godmother waved her wand over Olivia a few too many times.

There were plenty of travesties and tragedies throughout the night.  That's what happens when you have an open bar during a three hour awards show!