Even the little things.
I am substituting for seminary tomorrow.
(Seminary is the early morning Bible study class that Mormon high schoolers attend before school. Early - as in 6 am early.)
I wasn't worried about substituting for seminary because
1) I LOVE teenagers.
2) I LOVE teaching.
3) I taught early morning seminary for 5 years.
and 4) I am BRILLIANT! I kept ALL five years of lessons! I had them on my computer and transferred them to memory sticks so that I
After an extremely long week,
I came home from work on Friday and thought I should get my lesson together.
My obvious first stop would be to review the lesson material I used when I taught this lesson last time.
I keep my memory sticks right here -
Right here! Wait! Where are they?
That empty corner of my center desk drawer sent my mind into a panic.
They were here for the last two years. They were here!
Where could they be?
Usually, I freak out.
Usually, I would start tearing through every drawer in the household.
Usually, I would cry.
But I was too tired.
And I knew that if I started, 1) I wouldn't be able to stop, 2) I wouldn't find them and 3) it wouldn't solve anything.
I told myself that I wouldn't ever be teaching seminary again and I didn't REALLY need them.
Wow - maybe I'm starting to think rationally in my old age.
So I did nothing.
I DID ask Parker and Brian if by any chance they had seen them.
No and No.
Seriously, there is no reason for anyone to have seen them or used them or taken them.
And I did say a prayer that I would find them.
I was sad that 5 years and untold hours of work were GONE,
but really, screaming and yelling and weeping and wailing wouldn't bring them back.
Brian suggested that maybe, just maybe, he had copied them onto a memory stick of his (he taught seminary for a year and I SHARED! I know!!! It totally goes against my 3 year old self).
I check his 15 memory sticks and no, no seminary files.
I convinced myself to just let it go and not waste time being angry or disappointed.
Yesterday, we went to the Cub Scout Pancake Breakfast at McDonalds.
All of the little Cub Scouts were working hard to raise money.
Most of the ward showed up between 9 and 11.
Brian and I went at 8.
There weren't as many people there but we chatted with them.
As I was leaving, I stopped by a friend's table to say hello.
He mentioned that he heard that I was teaching Seminary on Monday.
Because he was an ex-Seminary teacher, he would appreciate my plight.
I told him about the missing lessons and my resignation.
He replied, "Really? Are you sure they are gone? When I copied all of the Pioneer Trek pictures and video this summer, I was given a memory stick full of stuff. I didn't look at everything but I just dragged the contents of the whole stick onto my computer and saved it. I think there were some seminary lessons on there."
"Oh yeah. There probably were. Those were Brian's from the year that he taught."
"Hmmm...I think there were a lot of files though. I could check when I get home."
"Thanks. If you have time to look, that would be great. I never gave Brian all of my files. Just one year. So I doubt it's what I am looking for. Thanks though."
Last night we came home and there was an email from my friend.
He had checked his computer and found 250 MB of seminary info.
He uploaded it to a location where I could look at it and see if it was the missing files and upload it back onto my computer.
It was 800 seminary lessons, scripture mastery resources, skits, handouts, commentary and hours and hours of work.
I don't know how he got all of those files.
I don't know where the memory sticks are.
It doesn't matter.
What matters is that even though I am one, teeny, tiny, insignificant person on this whole big earth,
the Lord KNOWS me.
He CARES about what I care about.
He wants to help me.........even with things that aren't essential to my eternal salvation.
He wants me to be happy.
And when I try to submit to His will and have done ALL I can do, He will do what I can't do for myself.
Thank you Heavenly Father! Thank you is not enough, but thank you!