VOTE for the BONEHEAD BROTHERS (in 50 Words or Less)

In our high school, Student Council isn't called Student Council.

It's called Student Leadership and it’s a class.

And it's obviously a very SERIOUS class!

If you are interested in running for any Student Body Office, you have to FIRST run the gauntlet and be accepted into the class.

It’s that time of year – time to apply to get into the class. And it is no simple task.

There are three steps to getting in-
1) Hand out four or five (I can’t remember) recommendation forms to your teachers. Four of the five must be core teachers. So you can’t just give them to the PE, Pottery and Choir teachers. You have to be on the good side of your Calc teacher too. Step one also includes writing an essay answering 2-3 specific questions about why you should be in Leadership, how you have shown Leadership and if you were in charge of coming up with a new all school activity, what would it be.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. It’s pretty competitive. If ONE teacher has a beef with you or takes off a point or two, you will probably be cut.
If you successfully navigate this step, you can go on to step TWO.

2) “Write a personal statement telling the student body why you would do a good job representing them, your ideas for the school, who you are, why you should be elected, etc.” This is limited to 50 WORDS. 50 Words! That’s a lot to say in 50 words. Everyone who passes step 1 (and this will be about 30 kids per grade) will have a teeny tiny picture and their 50 word statement put on a poster. Students will have a week to peruse the posters of candidates for their grade and then the student body will vote. The 30 or so kids per grade will be pared down to 15ish.
If you are voted in by your classmates, you will proceed to step 3, the final elimination!

3) You will face a jury of current student body officers and teachers in a 10 minute interview. You will have to think on your feet and answer questions regarding yourself, leadership issues, and pseudo scenarios like “If you are an underclassman and you were put in charge of a committee and some of your committee members won’t pull their weight, what would you do?”

So the Bonehead Brothers both made it through the first round. Phew!!!!!

They spent the weekend crafting their 50 WORDS. So much to say. So few words. They typed and cut, typed and cut and checked the word count over and over.

We’ve been involved in leadership for years. How many ways can you say, “I’ll listen to your ideas.” “I’ll be responsible.” “I’m creative.” Yada yada yada.

AND – WHO READS THESE? Seriously, how many freshmen are going to stand in the hall or the caefeteria and read 30 of these 50 word biographies?

Here is Parker’s 50 Words:

“Maybe you have seen me around. Maybe you haven’t. Since, I’m a foot shorter than everyone, maybe you thought I was a teacher’s small child. I’m actually your classmate. I was the little flare behind the massive bonfire at Homecoming. I’m small, but my ideas are BIG!”
Garrett is getting ready for his senior year. This is old hat for him and BORING. Those applying for the class their senior year tend to be a little…………silly?

Garrett came up with a few gems and had a hard time deciding what to use. Are you ready?

Option 1 – “Yuo juts psent 30 esconds raeding this, when yuo mhgit as wlel just vtoe fro me adn be dnoe. Vote for Garrett Cox!”

That wasn’t even 50 words.

Option 2 – “Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention. I’ve just been handed this urgent and horrifying news story. I need al of you to stop what you’re doing and listen! Vote for Garrett Cox!!!! (oh yeah, and by the way, Id be a good leader.)

Hmmm…….meaningless quote from Anchorman that everyone swears ALL the students will “get.”

Option 3 – “We were both young when I first saw you, I close my eyes and the flashback starts: I’m standing there on a balcony in summer air. See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns. See you make your way through the crowd and say hello. Vote for Garrett Cox.

Yeah – another meaningless 50 words of Taylor Swift. A sure vote getter.

Option 4 – “Hi, I’m Garrett Cox. It stinks that I only get 50 words to write about why you should vote for me because I feel like I could go on and on about my leadership qualities, or use catchy sayings, or do something funny but……..”

If you turn in more than 50 words they just cut you off at the 50th word.

Option 5 – “Insert a really corny and stupid campaign joke here that gets you to vote from…..then go vote for me. Vote for Garrett Cox.”

Well, we’ll see what he turns in. Actually, we won’t. I’m not going up to the school and standing in front of a poster and reading 30 little entries to find Garrett’s. We’ll see if the boys get voted in DESPITE their 50 Words.