Thursday, August 20, 2009

TEENAGERS 101

I'm playing along with Mamakatslosinit/ and Writers' Workshop.


Go there. See the prompts. Pick one. Write! Link up!


I chose prompt #2 - Things I've Learned From My Toddler.
Except that I don't have a toddler but I have something a lot like a toddler...
but bigger and smellier and sweatier!





So without further ado:
Things I Have Learned From My Teenager


- Skip dessert!

You know what a good follow up to a rack of ribs, baked potatoes, corn on the cob and salad is? ANOTHER MEAL! Always plan on two dinners: D1 served at 6ish and D2 served at 8 or 9. Oh, and D2 can’t be a repeat of D1.



- When you get cash from the bank teller, ask him to give you that $100 in $5’s. No matter what denomination you hand a teenager, you won’t be getting any change back.



- “My math teacher is so dumb. She doesn’t know how to teach,” means “She’s on to me and I can’t get away with anything.” BUT, if you hear that from the entire team, then it means the teacher really is dumb and can’t teach.



- Never say never: as in “My child would NEVER….” Because right when you are saying that, your child is probably out doing it!



- It’s NEVER a good time to clean their room.



- Anything that is lost is probably under the bed or in their car. Check the trunk!



- The best time of the day is probably 2 am. It is completely unreasonable to expect anything to get done or anyone to move before noon and nothing fun starts before 9:30 pm.



- Just because it’s 8:30 on Friday night and your teenagers don’t have plans, doesn’t mean they are “in” for the night. Anything can happen!





- You can sleep in the same sheets for a month, but if you get a clean pair of jeans out of your closet and try them on, wear them for 30 seconds and then decide to change, the jeans are now dirty. Do not put them back in the closet. Throw them in the dirty clothes.



- Speaking of closets, why have one? Nothing needs to be hung up. It is much better to throw all the clothes on the floor so you can see exactly what you have to choose from.



These are just a few things I have learned.
And it's obvious that I need some more schooling!

I Teenagers!

10 comments:

Ashley said...

My kids are 4, 3, and 1 so this scares me a little! I always appreciated honesty though where parenting is involved. It looks like my future involves me being broke and very hungry. : )

Margaret said...

I can so relate to the sheets and jeans thing!!! LOL

sarah said...

Your boys are handsome. Too bad I'm already shacked up- oh yeah, and old. That post is about me...I'm horrible with dirty clothes, shit under the bed, and so on and so forth. Dont want to embarass myself TOO much.

Missty said...

So right on! LOL Yep, we have all the above here at my house as well! Teenage boys you have to love them... Or kill them, and that wouldn't work well, I look horrible in bright orange.

{Kiki} said...

I guess your lessons are what I have to look forward to when lil' D becomes a teenager. I'm really scared now. Thanks for sharing and take care.
-Kiki

Jeanette said...

Love it! So true, especially the sheets and jeans. Funny.

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Priceless! I loved your list. A sin I sincerely hope my kids don't do all of those things by yhte time they are teens.

And - heck ya I'm stealing your button!

♥Amber Filkins♥ said...

Oh joy! What I have to look forward to. Except that I have 2 girls so far. Any advice there??? Oy.

Stopping by from Mama Kat's.

MommyBrain said...

What a great list ... makes me smile and feel a little fearful of what is lurking ahead ... in about 14 years! Thanks for sharing this :)

KelliSue Kolz said...

I am fascinated by the cupcakes. Two of them remind me of eggs, one sunnyside up, one fried. I may need breakfast soon.