You having been dying to here about the Great Idiot Race all weekend!
No one died.
Although we came close.
So the race was on a winding hill in a neighborhood next to ours.
But really, go ahead, you predict what is going to happen when 50 teenagers with longboards show up on your street.
Practice runs were taken.
Parker won first place in his first heat.
Xan (my niece) was the only girl in the competition, so she raced with boys and she was second in her heat.
My other nephews came in 4th in their heats.
No one was injured, so they are all winners in my mind.
Shortly after the first few races, a "nice" police woman showed up claiming she had received 20 complaints.
First, there are not even 20 people who live in the neighborhood where they were racing.
She did point out that
A. They did not get a street permit to "close" the street.
and B. What they were doing was dangerous.
Not to be deterred, everyone got in their cars and followed the race "organizers" to a new neighborhood.
I'm SURE they called ahead and got permission.
And I'm SURE they went ahead and filed AND received permits on the way over there!
So after a few practice runs on the new race course - an equally winding, steep hill, the races started up.
Call it mother's intuition, but when I saw neighbors come out of their houses and walk to their property lines and then retreat back into their houses without even coming over to ask what was going on,
I knew this would be short lived.
But seriously, did they think that this "gang" of hooligans was going to skate up their drive way and load up their boards with flat screens, computers and jewelty and board off into the sunset?
Come on people! Live a little!
Xan came in second again and the owners of the shop decided to "sponsor" her.
They gave her a new board, trucks and wheels. Woohoo!
Parker somehow joined in the wrong race but still managed to get second.
AND THEN THE SAME POLICE WOMAN SHOWED UP!
She WAS NOT happy.
She yelled at everyone.
We all stood in the middle of the street as she raved.
The racing was over.
Everyone new it.
But no one was exactly jumping in their cars.
She was not pleased.
And that is when she yelled:
"And if you don't leave, I will write you ALL tickets.
And you parents - I will give you $75 tickets for Child Abuse."
Wait! $75 tickets for child abuse?
If I had known that child abuse only cost $75, I would have started abusing my children A LONG TIME ago!
We all just kind of stood there........
With that, she got back in her car and left.
She left without giving us our tickets!!!!
Was that just an empty threat?
We finished our Otter Pops, picked up our trash, and the organizers of the race decided to call it a day and go back to the shop to hand out prizes.
Pretty much, I had had enough standing
felt ripped off because I didn't get a ticket,
and decided to call it a day.
Parker and all the racers went to the store to collect their prizes.
He came home with a new board and wheels.
I hope that was the END of Parker's racing career!