Thursday, May 28, 2009

IDLE HANDS ARE THE DEVIL'S WORKSHOP....ESPECIALLY IF THE HANDS BELONG TO THE BONEHEAD BROTHERS!


The Bonehead Brothers need NO encouragement…or free time for that matter.

HOT TIP for moms of boys – Boys must be kept busy.
It’s actually best if they have 2-3 jobs during the summer.
Boys are nocturnal unless they have been worked into the ground.
So physical labor is good.


Now, you know that Garrett has been gainfully employed for the last 7-8 months at Abercrombie. He has been looking for alternative employment though because (in his words) “They treat us like animals!” Really?????




In his defense, I have heard this from several reliable sources.


I just discount what HE says.


He applied for a Summer LIFEGUARD position back in February. Because he waited so long to apply (?), he received an offer as a substitute lifeguard. He was thrilled. He would be "on call" and work at all the pools in our community. The manager assured him that he would be able to pick up 40 hours a week subbing for people going on vacation etc.


They had a mandatory meeting last week.


If you didn’t attend the meeting, you were FIRED. That’s what they said.


Turns out, if you didn’t attend the meeting AND you didn’t call them the next day by 5 pm, you would be FIRED.


So, Garrett called the manager around 4 pm and asked if by any chance there were open permanent positions. She said she would get back to him a little after 5. He went golfing.


He called meat 5:52 and said he hadn’t heard.


You could hear his disappointment.


Then he called at 6:15 and said, “Sally called.” Long pause.


Me: “And?.......”


G: “There’s not anything.”


I slip into Mom Cheerleader mode: “Well that’s okay!!! You have the sub position and I am sure something will open up.”


G: Silence……….”Not really! I have a permanent position!”
My boys take great pleasure in tricking me. I don’t know WHERE they got it from!!!!


Me: “Wow! Congratulations! That is sooooo great. That is awesome….”


G: interrupting me….”Yeah, but it’s kinda far away…”


Me: “So, it can’t be that far away. All the pools are local. Where is it?


G: “Ummm….It’s at this neighborhood far away. I can’t pronounce it….. It’s spelled C-H-A-P-P-……”


It takes me this long to figure out he is spelling OUR neighborhood!!!!! Yeah, he will be working less than a mile away. His travel time is 2 minutes.




He can come home for lunch.
I can take him lunch.
I can go and embarrass him!


All his friends in the neighborhood will be working at pools that are 20-30 minutes away. They are incredulous that he got THE neighborhood pool. Of all the luck.


But as Garrett likes to say, “It’s a tender mercy.”


We went out the next day to get the requisite gear.


The most important thing to him is THE WHISTLE and of course he had to get the loudest one possible. I HATE that whistle!

5 comments:

Amy Pickledpigsfeet said...

I'm glad that he got a life guarding job nearby! If you would like the bonehead brothers to have something to fill their time you could send them here to me. We've got lots of things to move and then at the new house we've got lots of hiking/biking trails that we could go on to run out their energy.

valerie said...

Yay for Garrett! I agree-boys DO need lot's of things to keep them entertained. At least my oldest does. He has to be doing something all.the.time.

Missty said...

Fun summer! We have had a few life guard jobs. After buying the clothes, the whistle and then paying for the CPR class each summer, I am always left wondering if they made back all the money I was spending! lol

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Hey the bonehead brothers have a good outcome. I say you mondo embarrass him. You only get so many chances to do that!

JJ said...

Let Garrett know that they recent medical evidence has CPR experts considering discontinuing the use of mouth to mouth deeming it unnecessary and of no real benefit to the victim during resuscitation. I guess it would be no different than the victims he has tried mouth to mouth on in the past, no real benefit.

Now on the subject of chest compressions; that is a whole different topic...